15 Things No One Warned You About Your 20s
Twenties are some of the best years of our lives, but these are some tough years as we really start to make big changes in our lives. It's a time when you have to make decisions and will almost certainly make mistakes. This is even harder because you have less in the way of a safety net to fall back on. It's a time when you have to start trying to be a grown-up and doing grown-up things. But you also start to experience all of the downsides that come with being a grown-up like being broke and getting really bad hangovers. It's no fun at all.
We learn some harsh life lessons because our twenties are a time of big changes and to be honest we really don't want them to be. We want to live care-free lifestyles with no responsibilities forever and ever. Unfortunately that's never going to happen!
15 You start to lose touch with your friends
For me this became most apparent first when I went to college and then again when I graduated. As much as you cry on your last day of high school and tell your pals that you'll stay in touch forever, it doesn't always happen. People tend to grow into their true selves at college and leave their school days behind them. Then after college you lose touch with your college friends because people move across the country or around the world and so on. It's a really sad fact but you do learn who your real friends are. And there's something to be said about the people you don't have to speak to for months at a time but can reconnect with as if no time has passed at all.
14 You still don't really know what you want to do with your life
When you're young or when you're still in college you have this dreamy idea that by the time you enter the world of work you'll know exactly where you're headed. But it's just not true and it can be really quite terrifying. Your twenties are the years during which you begin on the path towards your future career. You don't want to waste anytime doing something that won't benefit your future, but you don't necessarily know what that future is yet - that's one scary thing. You don't want to get settled and then change your mind in a few years - that's another scary thing. You have a ton of different options and routes you can go in which can actually be a bad thing despite what the older generation may think. It's basically really really scary at this age.
13 Getting a job is hard
OK so getting a job at the local fast food joint is relatively easy, but I mean getting a real job is hard. So you are ready for a job that has opportunities for growth and progression. But now you're just one among millions of other twenty-somethings who all have the same qualifications and who are all competing for similar positions. So even if you do know what you want to do with your life (unlikely) it's not any easier for you.
12 You need to start making your own money
There will come a time in your life when you get cut off. That sounds a little like we're talking about a spoiled rich girl, but it's a reality for most people. Even if your parents only supported you with a little cash here and there it still helped. In your twenties, you're not entitled to that anymore unfortunately. It has some pretty dire consequences too. You can't always buy that new pair of shoes or go out for cocktails with the gals because you don't have an allowance anymore and that money has to go on rent.
11 Being broke sucks
This is a by-product of being young and earning your own cash. It's more than likely that you're a junior member of staff somewhere with a salary that could be much better and that you're going to have to wait a few years for yet. It sucks so much because in your twenties you have more opportunities and freedom. Yet you can't necessarily afford to take advantage of those freedoms however. And the really weird thing is that now that you have a job you're probably just as broke as you were in college because the more you earn, the more you spend on stupid things which leaves you broke and waiting for that next pay check.
10 You start to envy younger people
Not in the sense that you're a grumpy old lady talking about “the kids today” but in the sense that you wish you were still one of “the kids today”. When you're a teenager you have so much angst about wanting to grow up. But when you get there you realize that you are grown up, well sort of, you wish you were a kid again. In your twenties you have responsibilities that you just can't be bothered dealing with. We envy that care-free lifestyle with no worries and no responsibilities. Then again, I'm sure a lot of people in their thirties feel the same way about people in their twenties. But I'm not there yet so whatever.
9 You start to get strange new ailments
We are still shocked that in our twenties we already start to notice little changes in our bodies. You start to get things like indigestion and heartburn. How many 18-year-olds get heartburn? None. This is just one of the many pleasures of getting older. And you know what's even worse, you start to get really terrible hangovers. Gone are the days when you could drink several glasses of wine and wake up the next morning fresh as a daisy. In your twenties you start to really suffer from the after effects of a heavy night.
8 Social media is mocking us
Sometimes you feel like every picture you see on Instagram or Facebook includes your childhood friends who are now all grown up, buying homes, getting married and having kids. For those who are having a hard time finding 'the one' this can be very difficult to deal with. On the one hand you are happy for everyone but every picture is a reminder of how much pressure we put on ourselves to have the same things. This is a big part of our twenties and remember that things will work themselves out.
7 It's hard to find people to date
We put too much pressure on ourselves to conform sometimes. Because everybody else is dating and your BFFs are getting serious with their significant others you feel like you should be doing that too or at the very least having a date every once in a while. But it's hard to find people in today's society. You have a few options but they're pretty poor ones. You don't really want to go for one of the idiots on Tinder who sends you stupid chat up lines. You can't really date anyone at work because it could get awks. So where on earth are you going to find your future mate? Then you find yourself just going to the grocery store in hopes of finding the one, don't worry it will happen!
6 Your confidence will get knocked a few times
The deal is that you're not quite a wise, proper grown-up yet. That means that during your twenties you will probably have a few (let's hope it's only a few) epic fails. This might mean that you date somebody who is wrong for you a lot longer than you should. Or you might mess up at work and get into trouble. Or you might start your own business that sells books made out of pizza and fail miserably. Whatever it is it's likely that you'll feel like crap about yourself for a while after. But we must not forget that we need to make mistakes in order to grow.
5 You start to see the dark side of people
Although we're not quite there yet in our twenties, we become less and less naive as time goes on. I really wish this wasn't true because it's something that I have struggled with personally quite a lot. The harsh truth is that there are a lot of mean people out there. It makes me sound like a whiny kid to say that but it's when you're not a kid anymore that you realize it. There's so much hatred and violence and abuse in the world. The worst thing is that you can't do much about it. The nice guy doesn't always win. The moral and respectable people sometimes lose out. The only thing we can do I guess is put our faith in the good people and try our best to surround ourselves with positivity.
4 You have to make important decisions
You might not like it my friend, but it's in your twenties that you have to start making vital decisions that could effect your life. Should I rent or put a down payment on this apartment? Should I take this job to beef up my resume even though I don't like the sound of it very much? Should I give my ex a second chance? These are the things you have to deal with. Or you can just go travelling for a bit while you're still young enough to get away with it and leave the hard decisions for later. Many women also start to decide when they want to have kids, those in committed relationships will start to plan when to start having kids. Ahh so much to think about!
3 You feel a time limit on pursuing your dreams
This is part of the scary not knowing where you're going kind of stuff we've already spoken about. But no matter where you are in twenty years time you will more than likely have lots more responsibilities than you do now even though it feels like you have a ton already. That's why you have to try your very best in your twenties to get some stuff done while you still have the chance.
2 You have to start working hard
A quarter-life crisis is a real thing. Our parents cannot comprehend it. They don't understand the amount of pressure that millenials are under. We know it. That's why we have to work extra hard to achieve happiness. For me personally, this means striving for my own happiness and nobody else's. In other words, doing the best I can do right now and not comparing myself to others and the circumstances that they're in. It also means trying my best to enjoy the journey rather than always looking towards an end goal. And last but not least trying to have as much fun as possible. It's not all doom and gloom, we're in our twenties for goodness sake.
1 You start to lose your friends to their boyfriends
When some girls reach their twenties they start getting into “settling down territory”. They get boyfriends and they're suddenly all grown-up and want to start cohabiting and thinking about getting a mortgage with their boyfriend and all of that other boring stuff. But worst of all they start spending less and less time with you. Now they would much rather spend time with their boyfriends trying to make them happy by pretending to understand the rules of football than having a good old lol with their best friend. One time you were BFFs and envisioned a future together, now they're envisioning a future with somebody else. How dare they!